Equestria Presidential Debate
by liamdude5
Summary: What happens when Twilight Sparkle and Tails participate in a Presidential Debate in Equestria. What happens? Comedy. Rated PG for a censored cuss word and possible suggestive material. Not canon with my other fanfictions. Oneshot.


_This is an idea for a Saturday Night Live skit I had that I wrote and decided to post. This is not supposed to be canon with my other My Little Pony fanfictions. Also, be sure to be on the lookout for my Star Fox and Ratchet and Clank fanfiction and newest chapter of my Sonic and Star Wars crossover. Enjoy._

Announcer: The following footage is recorded in the Equestrian Political Center.

Lauren Faust: Hello. I'm Lauren Faust and I will be your moderator for tonight's presidential debate. Your candidates are last year's failed candidate, Twilight Sparkle, and new candidate from Möbius, Miles "Tails" Prower. The questions at this debate will be from some of the candidates' friends. The candidate whom the question is for will get 15 seconds to answer and the opposing candidate will 15 seconds to respond to the response. All right, our first question is from Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie Pie: Hi. Hi. Hi. Ok. So, I have a really good question. It's a really good one. You'll like it. Ok. Ok. Ahem. War.

Lauren Faust: That was a good question. Twilight Sparkle, your answer.

Twilight Sparkle: Well, I'm glad you asked that, because I actually prepared a few things to say about war. You see, I find that we need to have a greater army so we can defend ourselves from enemies and here's how we can afford it: we just have to...

Lauren Faust: I'm sorry, but your time is up, Twilight. Tails, your response.

Tails: Well, the fact of the matter is that there is no truly expansive army because my opponent and her friends would always stop anybody who attacks Equestria. Getting an army would just be another example of wasted government spending. Here are a few more examples:

Lauren Faust: I'm afraid your time is up. Our next question comes from Tails' friend, Sonic.

Sonic: Yes, I peeked at an Equestrian newspaper yesterday and I noticed that the economy has gone down majorly. I would like to know what the candidates plan to do to fix it.

Lauren Faust:Another good question. Tails, your answer.

Tails(Fast):I find that it would be a good idea to stop spending a ton of money on stuff like all of those decorations in the palace. One of the first things I would do is get rid of all of those tacky decorations they have in there, like the chandeliers. I mean, have you heard of ceiling fans?(Takes a deep breath.) How did I do?

Lauren Faust:Just under 15 seconds.

Tails:Yes!

Lauren Faust:Twilight Sparkle, your response.

Twilight Sparkle:What my opponent does not realize is that almost all of those "tacky" decorations were purchased back when the palace was first made, which I know because I am Princess Celestia's pupil. Most of the overdone government spending comes from all of the parties they throw. Here is some advice about that:

Lauren Faust:Time is up for you.

Twilight Sparkle:Can't I finish?

Lauren Faust:No.

Twilight Sparkle:Can't I at least reveal that it's OK to throw a party when it's somebody's birthday, but not when somebody goes into the bathroom and kills a cockroach.

Lauren Faust:No.

Twilight Sparkle:Well I just did.

Lauren Faust:Drat. (Slams fists on table.) I will get my revenge. But in the meantime, the next question is from Twilight's friend, Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash:Yeah, I overheard that your new policy will cut back on the budget for weather ponies and that some may get laid off. So my question is, "What the ****?"

Lauren Faust:Riveting. Twilight, your answer.

Twilight Sparkle:Rainbow Dash, you can't believe rumors like that. My plan, in fact, will try to increase the budget of weather ponies and other stuff like that. I, in fact, have a five step plan. Step one:

Lauren Faust:And your time is up. Tails, your response.

Tails:Now that is just offensive to me. The fact is that I had a five part plan, but Twilight Sparkle stole it. And I am personally outraged by that. (Tails slammed his fist on the podium.) Arrgghhh. How long was that?

Lauren Faust:Just a little over 15 seconds watch yourself. Moving on...

Twilight Sparkle:Hold on, what do you mean I stole your five point plan?

Tails:Again, you stole that idea from me.

Twilight Sparkle:Are you sure you didn't hear me say something about a five point plan and then accuse me of stealing it?

Tails:Definitely not.

Twilight Sparkle:Then tell me the five points.

Tails:OK. Part one:Ummmm...We sell stuff. Part two:Uhhhh...We fire between two or five million people. Part three:Weeeee assassinate Princess Celestial for money. Part four:Something. Part five:Profit.

Twilight Sparkle:What was that? You just made that up.

Tails:Did not!

Twilight Sparkle:Did too!

Tails:Did not!

Lauren Faust:And shut it! That little upset has taken a ton of time from the debate. While I think of something to shorten the debate, Knuckles, friend of Sonic, will ask his question.

Knuckles:Yeah, Tails said he would help my tribe rebuild our temple that blew up. However, when I touched one of the blocks of wood holding up the temple, the whole thing fell down. So, what are you gonna do about it?

Lauren Faust:Thinking. Tails?

Tails:Well, there was your problem. You weren't supposed to touch it or breathe on it. If you didn't do that, then it still would've been intact. Good job, Knuckles.

Lauren Faust:Not listening. Twilight Sparkle?

Twilight Sparkle:Is this really who you want to elect? Someone who would build something that could be destroyed with a simple touch? If it were me, I would've made that temple much sturdier. I would say how, but Lauren Faust would probably say...

Lauren Faust:Time's up. I have now figured out how to shorten time. The next two people asking questions, Applejack and Amy Rose, will ask their questions simultaneously.

(Applejack and Amy Rose ask incomprehensible questions.)

Lauren Faust:Perfect. Twilight Sparkle and Tails will now provide their simultaneous answers.

(Twilight Sparkle and Tails provide incomprehensible answers.)

Lauren Faust:And now they will provide their simultaneous responses.

(Twilight Sparkle and Tails provide incomprehensible responses.)

Lauren Faust:Great. We now have time for one final question from Twilight Sparkle's friend Fluttershy.

Fluttershy:OK. Alright. OK. Here is my question. Uh. It is, uh.

Lauren Faust:Just ask the question!

Fluttershy:OK.

(Fluttershy talks incredible quiet.)

Lauren Faust:Fluttershy, we cannot answer your question if we can't hear you.

Fluttershy:Stop pressuring me!

Rarity:Fluttershy, please calm down. It will be OK. You can do this. Remember, you are only asking a question that I wrote for you.

Fluttershy:OK. OK. I'm calm.

Rarity:OK. Now let me see the question.

(Fluttershy hands Rarity her notecard.)

Rarity:This is a grocery list.

Fluttershy:Yeah.

Rarity:Where is the question?

Fluttershy:I left it with Spike.

Rarity:Sigh. Twilight?

Twilight Sparkle:Yeah yeah. Spike!

(Spike appears, hands Fluttershy her question, and disappears.)

Fluttershy:OK. Here is my question:

Lauren Faust:Time's up. That concludes this Equestrian Presidential Debate. When we return, watch the latest episode of Party Ponies, which is a show about two ponies who work at a bakery and love to throw parties, which will be cancelled after tonight, which is convenient since it is the series premier. But for now, live from New York, it's Saturday Night!

_I hope you enjoyed. Favorite and review please_.


End file.
